I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
birth control should be required to get into college
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Randomize
