How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
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