I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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