the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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