We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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