STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
