Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
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i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
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