what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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