hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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