There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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