I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
one two three fourrrrnication!
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
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