no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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