so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Randomize
