You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You took a bar mat shot.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
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