I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
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