Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
