hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
