Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Randomize
