Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize