I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
