Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
