have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
