you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize