this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
