dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
