I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Randomize
