is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Randomize
