so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
