Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
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