Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
i think i have two assholes
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I always "accidentally" drop a condom and make sure she sees it's a magnum. By the time I'm inside her and she realizes how small I am, it's all over in a flash and I'm done. Plus, they never call back so I never have to see the girl ever again. #gratefulforprematuretinypenis
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
