Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Randomize