I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Randomize
