Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
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