Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Randomize
