Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Randomize