Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
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