They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
