Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize