Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Randomize
