If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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