oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
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