i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
