dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Randomize
