just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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