Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
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