dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
