There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
