the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Randomize