dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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