never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
