can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
Randomize